I don't know what the hell is up, I'm fucking up on my jobs, it's like I'm not here, I mean my body is present, but my mind seems to be lost in Transition. I'm not where I'm suppose to be, it feels like I'm being disconnected which is nice sometimes but not all the time, I think it's just personal issues tearing me apart, and the shit thing is, I could reconnect easily, but it seems that the more I can control my mind, the more intense it becomes, almost as if there is this constant battle going on with me on the inside. The more control I have, the more problems I get. I mean come on, can the universe stop fucking with me and just let me chill abit.
Clearly I need a holiday, I can't wait for 2010 to be over, all this work is killing me slowly, I don't feel the vibe building up to 2010, all I feel is irritation. I want to explode, but don't want to freak out at the wrong people, so let me swallow this explosion, because I feel myself imploding.
This is not a cry for help, this is just me having my freak on.........